Someday

good morning dear, how are u today?
still miss me in the heartbeat? :) me, too, honey...
i wish i could give you morning kisses, yeah, kisses, not a kiss! :p

u know dear, there is a worriness came up this morning, and i cant stop thinking bout it
i think about us, about our love, our hearts, our life, this distance, and about how patient we are day by day.
are we getting weaker? or we getting stronger... i do worry about the first...

i know i shouldn't, because i should believe that life can bring anything we dont expect
shit happens, and sometime we even didn't realize
anything can happen between us, anything, and now i tell u, i worry about any of that anything dear

because i believe being worry now is also a normal thing
and i just wanna be normal even for a while
i know in this life, where i am trying my best not to be afraid of losing you, i even more worry about living this life without you
i am afraid about the moment, about the seconds when i have to face the reality that after this very second, because of any reasons we have at that moment, i know that i am losing you...
and that will be hard
i know we will be fine, i know we will be alright, i know we will
but i just don't wanna face another break up
not another healing time
not another tears everyday
not you dear, not about losing you
but finally, still i have to say, though this is hard, i have to be ready for everything
still i wish separated is not one of that 'everything' :)

i wish someday we wont say another goodbye again when we have to back in distance
i wish someday i dont need to worry in the middle of the night realizing our time will be over and i have to wake up alone again
i wish someday we wont talk any to-do-list for the next three months and we just need to live this life together, not to be long for for another date in the next three months
i wish someday i will find myself not dealing with the distance and the waiting anymore
i wish someday we will be together, and there is no more flight waiting to take one of us leaving another

i am sorry i f iam telling you this and you feel hard to be with me
maybe u are not worry as much as i am
but you are the one i am living this love with
that is why i tell you about this
thank u for reading this honey
i worry, yes i do
but behind that worriness i have many wishes i am spreading everyday about loving you, about loving us...

maybe there is no hug today, maybe you dont find me now in your arms
but i wish, that 'someday' is ours
that 'someday' will come
and finally, there is no more 'someday'
because we already find ourselves living in that

i love you
i wish i will always do... :)